The load is heavy, its too much to carry,
Guess if Pain was a girl she’d be mine to marry,
They say things change for the good, seems my life isn’t in a hurry,
Because everyday I lose myself and a little bit of myself I bury,
Now I can’t picture my future inevitably my vision is blurry.
Look all I need is some rest because my life is always hectic,
These days I feel like a germ and life is the antiseptic,
Fighting unending losing battles, its hard to be energetic,
These days a smile to me is just another cosmetic,
I’ll probably turn to drugs, heard the dopamine rush is electric.
I heard its the hope that kills you, so were mine of becoming great,
All my plans are in doubt because it seems I’ll always be late,
Wondering if there’s a day where I’ll be comfortable enough to date,
Asking how I’ll ever love someone else if my very existence I hate,
All this seems like a heavy load to carry but I guess it’s just fate.
Words by Muriuki 